title: The Death of a Soldier Told by His Sister by: Khromeychuk, Oleysa published: 2022-09-01 read: 2023-10 preview

A book that should not have been. And still, it was. I’m in the great situation of being able to observe the senselessness of war, from a large, safe distance. And despite all the false rationalism, it baffles that, indeed, war exists.

And still, looking at history, war settles things. At least, sometimes. WW1 for instance. It ended the Austrian-Hungarian empire. It ended the Russian empire, started the Soviet Union. It ended the Ottoman empire. It ended the German empire, tens of countries were created or reinstated, the impact of the misnamed “Spanish flu” was probably a result of the war, and then, of course, Japan gained strength to continue their war against China, and Hitler exploited weaknesses of the Weimar republic – e.g., the regulation that it could not have an army, and thus not fight against Hitler – to create a coup; he succeeded the second time he tried.

But back to this book. Despite the huge consequences wars can have, this war feels utterly useless, and built on the ego of a single individual. That oversimplifies things, and questions close to this, about the senselessness of war, and of why people choose to fight, govern this book. But then, as you already know, written by the sister of a fallen soldier.

The list of army supplies I bought for my brother to help him with his life in the warzone was still lying on my desk when a new shopping list appeared next to it. This made my online order inventories pretty eclectic:
tartan paper napkins (3 packs of 20)
emergency burn care dressing (pack of 5)
yellow/blue satin ribbon (5 metres)
Tasmanian tiger khaki backpack (1)
table confetti (20 packs)
advanced blood clotting sponge (25g x 2)
favours for wedding guests (miniature whiskey bottles x 50)

If anyone saw this list, they would think I was either having a war-themed wedding or that I was getting married in the trenches. This wasn’t far from reality: my wedding was to take place just under a year after my brother had gone to the front. And while I was looking for a wedding venue in London, my mind was in the trenches in eastern Ukraine.

And so it focusses on coming to terms with what happens in a nation at war. If you have two siblings, and, after one of them dies, people ask you if you have any siblings, what do you answer? Do you say, ‘I have two brothers’? But that’s not true, because one of them is no longer around. ‘I had two brothers. Now I have one, because the other one is dead’? That is technically true, but it’s way too much information. People ask you questions about siblings to be polite; they don’t want to be traumatized by your family history.

A recommended read.